Rap 1

Majin Lardo, and no I don't excuse myself as big boned
I likes my food and don't care much about my muscle tone
Ruler of my zone, enslave ya whole f@#$in race
Not even keepin it secret, I spit straight in your face
In case you can't keep up with this ludicrous pace
shut ya mouth, pull up your skirt, you're showin off ya lace
panties boy, I commands whole legions of people
Run, hide in your church, I drop in from the steeple
Sneakin through your hall, take you all down, you falter
Leave a mess of your chest, laid out on the altar
Coughin up blood, look up, I'm just chewin my cud
I get joy from this, bitch, I run your name through the mud
I love dice'n your game, your shackled out by a master
Can you find what your after hung up from a rafter?
The laughter propels me, but still I take shit seriously
its gruesome to watch someone like you versus me
When I'm on the attack everyone just steps back
don't get your head cracked by the head of the wolf pack
just go get me a bagel, cream cheese, and coffe
Sgt. Greeenly,no serial crushers, but the villain's inside of me

Cleansed of 2001 body parts like Lever, catch the fever,
burn inside my head yet I still can't fight the sether
Neither beast nor man can understand God's plan
but I know there's some bitches put on earth to fan
the flames until it scorches my skin, switch to billows,
but your derogatory scurvy strikes me light like pillows
pussy willows, gnarled, bitches try to look scary,
people laughin at you fairies takin on this Dirty Harry
Carry pistols, packin heat, roam the streets, I see
I have to come down to your level, requires labotomy
It's not for me, instead I lead you to ambush with fear
Run you over with a Hummer, caught in my lights like a deer
and bitches steer clear of your speed bump, the f@#$in chumps
take a big dump on your face, ya dumb muthaf@#$in punk
ya stunk at 21, trying to rock rep on Jump Street
Stupid sucka suckling fuckin fresh off ya mom's teat
no envy, bitch tryin to be all you muthaf@#$in can be
dodge the local mob, then ya run off and join the army
don't come back here and think you can breath free
we pick up where we leave off, swing your ass from a tree

Deadly like the virus, contagious agents like SARS,